bukan negeri dongeng

Forgiving global grilling

2010-05-22T02:26:00.000-07:00

I’ve got headache for days, and I know, it because I was too much walking and standing by grilling hot sunny Jogjakarta. Sometimes I really want to wear sexy tank top like the European tourists who walking through Malioboro road. But, I’m Moslem and I can’t wear something like that. It’s not global warming, it’s global grilling. I felt more like potatoes or barbeque with dusty spice on my clothes and face.
You know, something tease me while I’m here in Jogjakarta is the fact that our generation never been apart as the stakeholders by the company who had destroy my world, by polluting the earth that I’m living now. They had not been considering the baby who’s not born yet as their stakeholders. If they could live 100 years longer than the average of human ages, they wouldn’t do that.
So our generation is disinherited. We don’t have anything except our greediness, our selfishness, our animal instinct to live. We’re going to school not to learn how to live in happiness and peace, but how we could get the best job, high salary, retired allowances, insurance. Live in stability (this word is to change “boredom”).
We are one nation with many tribe, race, and religion. But please don’t believe that we really love the pluralism. Well, that’s what I’ve got from my family and my friends’ families. They tend to dislike living with pluralism itself. Like so many Javanese and Sudanese, they hate to be hurt and they won’t critic someone they dislike in front of them. They’ll chose talking it at back behind. And one thing, they’ hate to be debated, or something rebellious. So, the best children are who always obey and hear what they said, without asking or complaining.
They have unwritten rules.
1. Parents never do or say wrong
2. Back to the first rule.
They love to critic the government when terrible rainy season, flood all over the city near by river or valley. But they throw the rubbish everywhere, in the public transportation, road, and river, train. Everywhere, except their lovely house or cars!
I knew the foolishness and poverty of our parents’ generation, but I can’t accept their attitudes who always being feel in the right way and never apologize to their younger generation by what they’ve done before we were born, their greediness by destroying our planet.
We just want to hear, “I do apologize to you…”
I’ll be waiting and trying so hard to forgive it.

I knew I love You

2010-02-26T19:10:00.000-08:00

I miss you badly.. not because of your son..cI love you because of you. I love you silently and secretly. Sometimes I wish you could be my mother. I never knew that you leave me so soon. You thaught me to be strong, how to love, how to stand up. I really miss you... the strongest woman.
You raise me up when I was rejected. You accept me unconditionally. Thank you My Lord who sent her to me. If someday I remember of you, I want to remember you as the nicest one I ever knew.

Reborn

2009-12-26T07:43:00.000-08:00

What would you do if you're not like really like what peoples said? I know you doesn't mean to be a lier or betrayer. But they just don't know the other side of you.
And what would you do if you know what kind of history behind you? You're growing, changing but there something inside you that you can't afford to get, you have no ability to catch. And it was said, "this is I am. I'm here before you were born, I'm exist even your trully body have not been made yet. I'm your soul and I will be with you for your whole life".
You can't chose your family, you can't chose your parents. But you can pick what kind way of life. You wouldn't know who you are until you know peoples surround you. Your lover and your enemy.
When you getting change, I know it's time to reborn the new you or you still the same old brand new you. So, what would you chose? I think it's up to you..!

Welcome to my life

2009-12-21T09:48:00.000-08:00

Islamic New Year
5th Muharram 1431 H.
I know I'll do something new.
And here I am. Welcome to my life.

My Journey of never ending inquiry.